General Chat / 'Yo Momma' jokes

Your momma is....

so poor, she went to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers

so fat, she's got more crack than Harlem

so dry, you have to roll her in flour to find her wet spot....

so loony, that her first born child was named Turtleman

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Let's hear what 'yo momma' jokes you've got....

so short she can do kartwheels under the bed...

that's all I got.

Yo momma is so stupid that when your house was on fire she was on the roof singing "CLAP YOUR HANDS, STOMP YOUR FEET, PRAISE THE LORD, WE GOT HEAT!!!"

Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

So Ugly that when she throws a Bumerang it doesn't come back!

Yo' momma is so hairy, she has afros on her nipples.

Yo' momma is so fat she uses pillows as tampons.

Your mother is so old that when I told her to act like a woman on her age - She died

so thick she got locked in sainsbury's and starved to death.

so fat shes on both sides of the family

yo mammas like a bowling ball. she gets fingered 3 times, rolled down the ally and still comes back for more.

^nice ones Richie

how bout...

yo momma's so fat, she wears a VCR as a pager

Your momma's just like a brick, She's dirty and gets laid by mexicans.

yo mamma so poor she walks around with a matrice on her back screaming for volenteers.

shit, i cant spell..

Yo' momma's so fat, when she went to the Zoo, the zoo keepers started feeding her peanuts.

LOL, made that up in 2 seconds, so sue me...

-Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.

-Yo mama's so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker.

-Yo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.

-Yo mama's so big, she whistles bass.

-Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.

Yo momma's so stupid, she asked the Orange Band to play Happy Birthday.

(Anyone who lives in N. Ireland will get it.)

Yo momma so fat, that when she falls over she rocks herself to sleep trying to get back up again.

To momma so fat when she gets on the bus 50 people have to get off.

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"

Yo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test!

Yo Mamma's so fat, but I fucked her anyway.

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

^ Actually made me laugh.

You too, TPM.

TPM's made me chuckle....

Yo' momma's poonani is so dry, even the crabs carry canteens

Yo momma is so ugly, she had to be fed with a slingshot when she was little

Yo momma like a shot gun, two cocks and she blows

Yo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test

Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.

Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight

Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars

Yo momma so ugly they filmed, "Gorillas in the Mist," in her shower

Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say ,"Damn, is it Halloween already

Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye

Yo momma fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Yo momma so fat she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book!

Yo momma so fat, she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says, "Okay"

Yo Momma's so fat, she saw a school bus go by and yelled,

"HEY STOP THAT TWINKIE!"

Yo Momma's so ugly she doesn't need a costume for Halloween.

Yo Momma's so ugly when she walks outside people say, "I didn't know it was Halloween yet."

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, No Professionals."

Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.

Yo momma so poor burglars break in her house and leave money.

Yo Momma so poor she can't afford the o or the r.

Yo Momma so poor you asked her where the facilities were, and she said, "Pick a corner."

Yo momma so stupid, she thought, "Wu Tang" was an African orange drink!

Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.