General Chat / Rate the Family Guy quote above you

5/10

"911?

yea, its qaugmier.

yea yea, its stuck in the window this time."

8/10. That was hilarious.

Peter: "Excuse me sir, I belive you are in my seat and I had sex with your mother."

New Yorker: "What'd you say?"

Peter: "What, about the seat or me plowin your fathers wife?"

lol

^^7/10

That's a typical good quote.

(Peter and Brian are being pulled over by cops)
Peter: "Don't worry, Brian, I can handle this."
(Cop comes up to door, Peter is holding his shirt over his left nipple.)
Cop: "Uhh...Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to pull your shirt down."
(Peter remains holding it up)
Cop: "Uhh...sir..."
(to Brian) Peter: "Crap! We got the only straight cop in Rhode Island!"

heh. pretty funny. maybe a 6.545454 with a bar on the last four.

ah, you got some on your shirt. you know what's good for getting that out? sex with another man!

9/10. I think I remember that quote.

Two baseball players are out on a baseball field, I can't realy remember the episode too well, but I think they were opposing teams or something.

Player 1: Gum? (Or something along those lines)
Player 2 takes the gum and chews it
Player 1: Hahaha that was trick gum now you're addicted to heroin.
Player 2: Hahah....soooo cold

5.

Vincent Van Gogh: "You want kids? I should have thought about that before I got you this."

9/10. Even though it would be hard to understand if you didn't see the episode.

Scout Master: Your boy is out of the scouts it's been two years and he hasn't earned a badge.
Peter: Oh come on give Chris one more chance
Scout Master: Ok, he has three days to earn a badge.
Peter: Three days?! That's tomorrow, we better get going.

5.

Vincent Van Gogh: "You want kids? I should have thought about that before I got you this."

Don't paraphrase.

9/10. Even though it would be hard to understand if you didn't see the episode.

Scout Master: Your boy is out of the scouts it's been two years and he hasn't earned a badge.
Peter: Oh come on give Chris one more chance
Scout Master: Ok, he has three days to earn a badge.
Peter: Three days?! That's tomorrow, we better get going.

lol

6/10



"Is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you: very homosexually."

8/10...the way he says it is pretty funny.

Peter Griffin: Our children our greatest treasure. They deserve a school board president who doesn't leave her feminine ointments in the fridge next to the mustard. That was the worst sandwich I ever ate! She flosses in bed. She snores like a wildebeest. She freed Willie Horton. She nailed Donna Rice.
Lois Griffin: Peter, that's enough.
Peter Griffin: Eats babies.

hehe, solid 8/10.

Brian: "I'm not drunk, alright? I just have a speech impediment... [vomits on bar] ...and a stomach virus... [falls on floor] ...and an inner ear infection."

9/10....that's one of my favorites.

Stewie: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.

The beauty of simplicity.

8/10 good one

Chris: Hey, birthday dude! You want some ice cream?
Stewie: Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you.

HAHAHA 9.5 that cracks me up every time.

I may butcher this one a bit as it's fuzzy but the punchline's what's important.

Peter: Hey kids, remember that Christmas present you always wanted but never got?
Chris: A bike?
Meg: A pony?
Stewie: A dead Lois?!

Which is funnier when the town blows up and the hippies left over won't let them pass until they tell them one thing to bring to a picnic, to which everyone replies "potato salad" or "fried chicken", except for Stewie, who's opinion is

a dead lois!

Ah..................7.5 I guess.

Peter: You know that pony you wanted when you were 6? Well, I got it and I've been saving him for this very moment!
(Peter opens closet and skeleton of horse appears)
Meg: [screams]
Peter: Oh, t-that's right. Ponies...ponies like food, don't they?
(Front leg of skeleton falls off)

ahahaha! that was a great one!

10/10




(basically)
Tom Tucker: Police received news of the real arsonist from an anonymous tipster.
*at home*
Giant Killer Cockroach: Goooood... Goooood...

^ 6/10

Stewie: Let me guess, you picked out yet another colorful box with a crank that I'm expected to turn and turn until OOP! big shock, a jack pops out and you laugh and the kids laugh and the dog laughs and I die a little inside.

It's the way that he says it...the "and I die a little inside" is what gets me every time...lol

ahahaha!  that was a great one!

10/10




(basically)
Tom Tucker: Police received news of the real arsonist from an anonymous tipster.
*at home*
Giant Killer Cockroach: Goooood... Goooood...

That one isnt really funny until the cockroach appears again, at the end. Then it turned absolutely hilarious.

Well, that's what I meant I guess.